(Photo Credit: @Kevin)

Hi friends,

I hope you are well - I’m currently writing this while waiting for my second job interview of the day. It’s been a rather weird day so far, weather wise; it was raining on one side of the street and another it remained dry and hot. Is this how the world ends? 

Anyway, I just wanted to pen down my thoughts and maybe just a little reflection because I always find that the best way to get to my emotions and feelings is to do a little typing.

As you read, I’m at my second job interview which means I’ve already had the first (wow Sherlock). And it was one of the weirdest interview experiences I’ve ever had. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve sat in places where I’m told I’m not suitable for the job, I’m over qualified, I’m under-qualified and all that fun stuff and I’m good. Because not everyone is suitable for every job out there and that’s ok.

But today, I basically spent 45 minutes of my life just sat there taking insults after insults by my interviewer and it was a whole other experience on its own. On one hand, I 100% get where the interviewer (A) is coming from. A is a self-accomplished, young CEO in the tech industry, and like she repeated to me many times, it is rare and it is a great accomplishment. She also made sure that I understood that she is a minority in her own country and also in my home country, Singapore. And she said she rose to where she is today and she is proud of where she is at, as she should be. I 100% respect that, I respect that she is ‘self-made’ and I respect that despite the probably bad circumstances she was thrown into for being a minority in so many places, she stood out and build a name for her own - amazing, admirable. 

What I personally do not respect is the fact that amongst the fact that she was praising herself and her beliefs, she sat there going through work I previously did and said “I think your previous work is very weak” and all that fun stuff. She also talked about how I am less trendy than she expected because she said “I thought you came from the UK and you should be at yeast 5 years ahead of Singapore.” And it gets rather tiring to defend 

That is coming from the person that did not understand when I said “people my age” vs “people my parent’s age” and told me to distinctly state between ‘Millennials’ and ‘Baby Boomers’

And that’s perfectly fine if it is not for the way she said it. Throughout the interview I felt that every time I was trying to answer a question, I was cut off and every time I tried to ask one, it was ignored. But hey, that’s what you get sometimes. 

I guess that is okay. I’m not entirely sure if my ego is bruised or that I am truly and genuinely hurt because I do always give my 100% to all the work I do. And she did not see it from the circumstances that I was working under or even that it was my “first full time job” back in the motherland. But this is probably the harsh truth of society, most people only see results and what they want to see. Even though her words were rough, I did get some learning points out of it and I did take mental notes on what I can work on in the coming days. 

I just wanted to write this down and just release the emotions into the wild and just put the negativity and all the wrongs that she saw in me aside and know that my worth is not dependent on just one person. Even though the words she used were very harsh and all that, I did get that this industry is HUGE and I have many, many more things to learn. And the place is probably not one for me to learn and grow in my skills since they are looking for people who’ve already got that. 

So for now, I’m on a mission to further educate myself in my free time while I look for a place to nurture my passion in what I do. 

For anyone out there who’s reading this and looking for a job - don’t give up. 

Closed doors are closed for a reason, the right place will come, you just have to keep looking. And in the meantime, know that you create your own future and your worth is what you decide it to be. And a note to anyone who find themselves to be a minority - thank you for not giving up on your dreams, keep fighting and if you need a helping hand, you know where to look!

Till next time,
Cheryl