Getting over someone?

Hey guys!
So this is not a cafe review or an update of my month/life (even though i should really do one for the month of Jan-Feb, gosh i need to start updating more) but the past few months of my life has been pretty much full of...learning i'd say.

Learning is the nicest way i can ever put this experience into words because the whole process involves shit loads of crying, sleepless nights, dreams, heartaches, avoiding, hogging onto my phone, reading, writing, annoying my friends, distraction, grades dropping, starving, bloating, exhaustion and all that "fun" stuff, basically it is called a heartbreak.

I know this is a rather touchy subject and such topics haven't met the face of this blog for awhile but through the (newly labelled) toughest period of my life, i've learned a few things that can help you through a heartbreak. I honestly have to say that i haven't really got out of the heartbreak phase and have no rights to force these on you, neither will these 100% work for you but you can totally read this for fun!

#1: Make a decision
Honestly, being in a state of denial is the best state to be in when you are going through a shit time i got to admit. Because it feels familiar enough to be around and even though it hurts, it still seems better than whatever that is out there. BUT i realised that to start getting over someone is to make the decision that you actually want to get over them. Through this time i find myself admitting either to my friends or even to myself that i don't want to move on, i don't want to admit that things changed and all that and it took a whole lot of time for me to come to terms with myself that yes, it's time..

#2: Friends/Family
They are the main reason for you to get out of bed (other than responsibilities like work/school), the main reason that you will hit the shower and get your ass out of your house. Through this period of time i really discovered the difference between people who truly care and people who are just nosey, sure some appear to be really concerned and all but then again, appear. Some friends will stick around through your late night thoughts and be there to listen, some will drop you texts, some will send you funny stuff, some will help you out in school, some will call you and check on you and some will just tell you to get over yourself. I really found out who are the people i can count on and who really needs to get out of my life, i got to tell you though sometimes the person you think will stick around the most is the first one to run away, and yes it will hurt on top of your already broken heart.

#3: Take all the time
I'm a person who hates waiting, i have no patience especially for pointless things and to me, heartbreaks are absolutely unnecessary and time consuming. It distracts me and puts me in all the bad positions i don't want to be in which is why i rush myself to get over this person like crazy. I did all the things that i thought would hasten the process but i usually end up with a heart more broken than ever. SO what i learned from this is that, take all the time you need, it may take days to weeks to months or even years but you are going to get better, just trust me on this. Don't ever rush things and there is no such thing as an "express ticket" to getting over someone, i tried and it didn't work.

#4: Self-control
One of the hardest part would be to get used to life without this person whether you have spent a few mere moments or years with them and it takes shit loads of self control to not talk to them or pretend they don't exist. I totally get it, the urge to pick up the phone to drop a text or give them a call and almost wanting to beg them to come back, i get it but it does nothing good to you. It will only break you further and when you think your heart is at it's worst and what else can go wrong right? You'll be surprised, apparently there is no limit to how much your heart can break but one thing i know for sure is that each break hurts more than the previous one. ALSO, have the self control to not check their social media because it will kill you, it will. Don't be a stupid person to go and full on stalking mode checking their likes on facebook/instg or their favorites/retweets on twitter, just don't.

#5: Keep yourself busy
Be it with school work, work, friends, social life or anything. Just keep yourself really occupied or just do so much things that you fall asleep the moment your head hits the pillow, this will keep your "extra thoughts" at bay for as much time as possible so  you won't have the time to think about the past or the 'what ifs'. I have to say though, personally i have been pretty caught up with school and almost been too busy to have time for anything else, i still find my mind wondering to places and thoughts that can break me and don't be surprised or annoyed when you do because it happens! Your thoughts are used to going those places already, give it some time to adapt and it'll be fine soon.


Yeap, those are the top 5 tips that i can currently come up with and share with you guys about what i've learned in this process. Like i said, i'm not totally out of it and you can say that it's not working but to me, it has helped me get over some days which i am extremely thankful for. One thing you can take away from this blog post is that, pain is temporary, at some point of time it'll get better, it must get better! Just be strong and stay strong!




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